Mentors in the Movies: Yoda, Leigh Ann, and Lionel Show Us What Mentoring Means

Master Yoda was a mentor: he trained Luke Skywalker to become a Jedi Knight. Leigh Anne Tuohy was a mentor: she coached the athletic talent of Michael Oher, who became a top draft pick for the NFL. Lionel Logue was a mentor: as a speech therapist, he helped the King of England speak without stuttering. You can watch them work their mentoring magic in Star Wars (1977), The Blind Side (2009), and The King's Speech (2010).

When you mentor someone, you use the highest possible level of skill with people to benefit another human being, guiding him or her with regard to a particular set of challenges, usually offering specialized knowledge, and always in the context of a relationship. Many different kinds of professionals are mentors: For example, physicians give their patients medical recommendations; ministers guide their parishioners on spiritual matters; and lawyers advise their clients regarding legal concerns.

In The King's Speech, the therapist Lionel played a mentoring role for Bertie, a member of the royal family who became the King of England during the course of the film. Bertie stuttered so badly it was excruciating to hear, but he had to speak live on the radio during World War Two—while his entire country listened in! Lionel used expertise from his field of speech pathology to help Bertie overcome his shame and stuttering. As a result, his speeches sustained England's resistance to Hitler's Third Reich.

Mentors pass on more than knowledge. They believe in their protégé and connect on an emotional level. Yoda knew how to access the power of the Force, and he persisted with Luke's training despite the aggravations of dealing with a brash young man. Leigh Anne understood how to use Michael's quick reflexes and protective instincts in the game of football, but she also responded to his need for a loving family. Curing speech defects was Lionel's job, but he gave more to Bertie than he was ever paid for, including the gifts of understanding and acceptance.

The task we will tackle in this blog is how to guide your child or student with regard to the challenge of choosing her life's work and preparing for future roles. What does she want to do with her life? How can she best hone her skills and connect her passions to meaningful work? What kind of training would make the most of her strengths, providing competitive advantage in the workplace? 

These are crucial questions. For me, they're even spine-tingling questions. However, the only person who can truly answer such questions is the student. When the time is right, a career development professional will be the ideal resource, but until then, your child is likely to look to you, a trusted adult, to get her started in a good direction.

Please note: Mentoring is not the same as telling a young person what to do. That's too much responsibility, and thankfully, it's not our job. To use a common mentoring metaphor, your protégé is like a seed, already containing what she needs to become a plant. You don't get to pick whether she turns into a poinsettia, a petunia, or a potentilla. But you do get to provide water and sunshine, so she can grow to be the glorious flowering plant she was meant to be.

While we're using metaphors for mentoring, let's add two more. We want to avoid the relational equivalent of grabbing our child by the scruff of the neck, bringing her too close and forcing her to comply. Mentoring is not a socially sanctioned opportunity to control or manipulate (which is why Leigh Ann made sure Michael understood that it was his choice whether or not he played football for Ole Miss). Instead, mentors hold out open hands, offering a gift the recipient feels free to take or leave. When we do our part well, our protégé will benefit. Maybe even as much as the King of England.